Category Archives: music

This is Not Your Year by the Weepies – sunday song post

This has been a very sad weekend. I’m going to write about it this weekend. But for now here is This is Not Your Year by the Weepies.



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“Life’s for the Living” by Passenger – Sunday Song Post

Well last week I restarted my Sunday song posts and this week I’m already late again. Oh well. In the theme of picking songs that speak to my depression I chose the song Life’s for the Living by Passenger. The lyrics touch me and while it sounds like a sad song it does give me some hope.

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bringing back the Sunday song post – Blue Skies by Noah and the Whale

This song really speaks to my depression and I’ve been enjoying listening to it so I thought it would be a great first post to bring my Sunday songs back. Enjoy – Blue Skies by Noah and the Whale. 


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nobody’s got it all together (Jill Phillips) – sunday song

I discovered this song before Laureate. I was slowly dying and no one knew and I listened to this song obsessively as I did behavior after behavior. So what prompts me to choose it as my Sunday Song tonight? Well, I think it’s a good reminder that although on the surface it may appear like things are good and well for a person that doesn’t tell the whole story. “Nobod’sy got it all together” is the norm – not the other way around.


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Filed under coping skills, eating disorder, eating disorders, faith, Hope, Life Story, music, PTSD, Recovery, Sunday Songs, survivor

sunday song – gone, gone, gone

Sunday Song for this week is Gone, Gone, Gone by Philip Philips. I love this song and it’s message.



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sunday song – The Scientist covered by Glee

Well, I’ll admit it – I’m obsessed with Glee songs again. No shame. They make me happy. So this week Sunday song is of course taken from their wide repertoire (they recently celebrated their 500th song). I also have one more thing to add I maybe, sorta, a lot watch Glee because Darren Criss (Blaine) is pretty much amazing.

This song was sung towards the beginning of the season and several of the Glee characters were having some difficulty in their rocky love lives (effectively breaking up two of the most beloved couples) but forget about that and just listen. It’s pretty beautiful even if you aren’t a Glee fan or just look at Darren Criss. That’s okay too.


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blessed be the name of the lord – sunday song – Easter

Spirituality and faith has been something I have been slowly exploring since my time at CFC. The Center for Change placed a very large emphasis on spirituality. They believed that faith in something was an important part of recovery. And I believe this as well. As I search through my own beliefs and am trying to make my own faith personal I can see how it positively effects my recovery.

When I was at the Center I loved to play piano during a time we had called “togetherness” where inpatient and residential spent time together. I played the piano in the basement different tunes and at times had others singing along. I had a hymn book and there was one particular hymn that I grew to love. This song was “Blessed Be the Name of the Lord”. In fact, at my goodbye group I played this song because I believe that faith and hope is my future.

Today, for Easter Sunday I choose this as my song of the week.



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Filed under faith, Hope, music, New Life, Recovery, Sunday Songs, survivor

monday mood lifters – February 4

Here they are….

Monday Mood Lifters

1. I managed to get all of my empty picture frames filled with pictures of Ben. Now they are scattered all over my apartment and I no longer have empty frames staring at me.


2. I have rediscovered the coping skill of coloring and I have a book of stained glass Mandalas I have been coloring. When they are finished they look like this and I hang them in my window.


3. Learning why my favorite artist Kelly Rae Roberts tips some of her angels heads and not others. I love, love, love her things. Here is the link to that article. And here is my pieces of her collection.


4. My new bird from Beth to keep me company at night – Midge.


5. My new budget App (Home Budget Lite) and the fact that for the first time in my life I actually have a budget and I’m following it. It makes me feel much less guilty when I spend money.

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6. The organization Sevenly which each week picks a cause or charity and then sells shirts that benefit that organization. I have bought shirts to help raise money for service dogs, wells in Africa and this week burn victims. Check them out!

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7. The fact that this happened last night. A grown man making a confetti snow angel? Yes. Hilarious.


8. This song covered on Glee. How beautiful and appropriate for the storyline for Marley (she has an eating disorder).

9. This:

10. And of course Benny….


Filed under Ben, coping skills, dogs, Funny, Monday Mood Lifters, music, New Life, quotes, Recovery, survivor, Tumblr

Daylight by Maroon 5 and Playing for Change

This week my Sunday Song is Daylight by Maroon 5 and Playing for Change. Playing for Change is a really neat organization that Maroon 5 teamed up with to produce this song. Here is what the organization Playing for Change is:

Playing for Change is a music project series which brings together musicians from around the world. All profits go to their non profit foundation which builds music schools for children around the world.

All PFC performers where recorded and filmed live outside and this musical journey takes us from the streets to the stage to the hearts of the people. Playing For Change is a movement uniting people everywhere through music.

Be sure to check out Playing for Change’s website.

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we love each other too much to let each other go – “to be with you”

Tonight was family Christmas on my mother’s side. Each year we celebrate by exchanging sock gifts for a person we have drawn the year before. We all come together open gifts, spend time together, eat cheese and veggie dips and soups for dinner. As a child these celebrations were magical times of gift opening and waiting in anticipation for my turn. We always went in order from youngest to oldest which meant that  I was always number four (the first girl). At that time Grandma filled our socks and we each opened our two presents from Grandma and Grandpa. Since we have started the name draw instead of Grandma and Grandpa filling each sock the person who drew our name does so.  This means that each year the presents are unique to that gift giver and it is (supposed to be) a surprise to who had us. I’m much older so I’m not breathless with anticipation to open my sock gifts but I do look forward to it eyeing my sock and trying to gauge who it’s from and what is in it. I like to watch the person who I had shopped for open their sock and discover what I found for them.

This year was a little different. Our gathering was smaller than normal as my family more than twenty-five is scattered far and wide but we still held our sock exchange, laughed at the little girls, admired baby Kinely who is less than a week old and enjoyed each other’s company. I was also blessed to have my Grandmom (my father’s mother) here from Denver. She joined our gathering and I loved knowing that many of the people I loved were in the same room or represented by the socks they had sent.

One thing that has become apparent to me this year as the family has continued to scatter is that it takes work to be a family. Especially, an extended family. It takes dedication. Love, yes but also dedication, a dash of stubbornness and a huge amount of commitment. When you live far from someone you love it is easy to let a relationship go. I’ve watched my father work to continue his relationship with my Grandmom, calling every night even when they may not have lots to talk about. It works. They are close and they have a bond. Without those phone calls and the decision to communicate the relationship could easily have been lost. And now for the first time as my mother’s side of the family begins to truly scatter it marks a change and it requires something new from all of us. A new form of loyalty, love and effort. But I have no doubt we have it in us. We love each other too much to let each other go.

And now….my normal Sunday song. This songs means a lot to me this year as I am home for the first time in four years and my grandmother from Denver who I have not seen in years joins us for Christmas. It is called “To Be With You”.

We come in from our travels
Lay our gifts beneath the tree
my mothers in the kitchen
the parade is on tv
my father’s with his father
their setting out some toys
the kids all want the train he’s had
since he was a boy

to be with you
to be with you
i love this time of year
it always brings me here
to be with you

I fall in with my sisters
just like when we were young
my grandma holds the baby
she rocks and softly hums
we gather round the table
we close our eyes and sing
Praise God from whom all blessings flow

to be with you
to be with you
i love this time of year
it always brings me here
to be with you

Praise God from whom all blessings flow

We set our milk and cookies
the kids are quick to bed
they know St. Nick is coming
and nothing need be said
we gather by the fire
reminiscing by it’s light
the kids will be up early
but it’s hard to say goodnight

to be with you
to be with you
i love this time of year
it always brings me here
to be with you



Filed under faith, family, Hope, life events, music, New Life, Recovery, Sunday Songs